Lying on his deathbed, the rich, miserly old man calls to his long suffering wife.
"I want to take all my money with me," he tells her.
"So promise me you'll put it in the casket."
After the man dies, his widow attends the memorial service with her best friend.
Just before the undertaker closes the coffin, she places a small metal box inside.
Her friend looks at her in horror.
"Surely," she says, "you didn't put the money in there."
"I did promise him I would,"
the widow answer.
"So I got it all together, deposited it in my account, and wrote him a cheque.
If he can cash it, he can spend it."
Nancy Kurtz
***********************************************************************
In a hotel bar,
a middle aged man sees a beautiful
woman sitting drinking alone.
He sidles casually over to her and says,
"Where have you been all my life?"
"Well, she says,
"for the first half of it, I wasn't even born"
Robbert Gabbitas
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